nice clean sand
hot day at dume beach
at the far point
we climbed to the top of the hill
at sunset
300 degrees of ocean
waves crashing below
attachment is a curse
forever carrying shadows
of loss and pain
there is nothing else
besides escaping from this shadow
in our life
time is a cruel ordeal
forcing divorced children to struggle
with attachment
each daddy day
but managing the conversion
from stranger
to child
then back to stranger again
in six hours
cannot be easy
how does this affect a child
living a life of separation
never having any stability
any normalcy or security
hopes of reconciliation
raised and crushed each day
they withdraw
practice dis-attachment
self-hate and ambivalence
but they are still children
who want to love their father
a three year old searches for memories
of their last meeting
of favorites songs heard
of people, places and things
desperate to connect
to find common ground
with the stranger
before he is lost again
all is maya/illusion
attachment is thought
thought exist because of fear
fear of the unknown
fear of the present and future
too fearful to live
we hide in illusion
we use thought to interpret the present
and predict the future
to mitigate our fears
but then thought takes over
and we stop living
thought is a mess
its only aim is continuity
it serves up ego
self-aggrandizement
guilt, greed, jealousy, hate, love
everything including the kitchen sink
to keep us enamored and entrapped
accepting shadows
accepting the unknown
makes a moment possible
of ending thought
